A Flexible Mind: Reading Guide
- Marcelo Aguirre
- 3 days ago
- 8 min read
«Against strong winds, flexible grass fares better than the rigid trunk» (p. 16).
A Flexible Mind: Tools for Integrating Psychological Flexibility and the Enneagram into Your Personal Growth (2025) is an integrative work that interweaves the foundations of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) and the Enneagram of Personality, with the aim of helping the reader develop a mind that is more open, conscious, and congruent with their values.
Through the six processes of psychological flexibility (Hexaflex) and their application to the nine personality styles, the book invites you on a path of profound self-knowledge, proposing experiential exercises, therapeutic metaphors, and practical resources to move from automatic psychic functioning to a life of greater inner freedom and authenticity.
For those who haven't yet read my recently published book, I present this reading guide designed to help you understand the central thrust of the work and how you can apply its contributions to your daily life to enhance your self-knowledge and personal development. My intention is that, upon finishing this article, you will take away practical ideas and transformative distinctions that you can then delve deeper into the book if you wish.
An integrative map for a complex journey
In this book, I propose a fruitful dialogue between ACT and the Enneagram. Both models integrate and strengthen each other, forming a kind of journey map, providing us with guidance and tools to advance in the complex process of personal growth.
ACT offers a functional model of change and transformation based on six key psychological processes (the sub-skills of psychological flexibility): present-moment awareness, cognitive defusion, acceptance, self-as-context, values clarification, and committed action aligned with your values. These form what is known in ACT as the Hexaflex .
The Enneagram provides us with a comprehensive model of personality styles, each with their underlying motivations (passions and fixations), automatic response patterns (defensive mechanisms), and latent potentials (essential virtues and transcendent ideas). Through its nine types, we can better understand our tendencies and evolutionary paths, as well as improve our relationships with those around us.
The proposal of this work is the integration of both models: using the Enneagram to identify where (in what patterns) and how we get trapped in our ego, and applying the powerful tools of ACT to cultivate a more conscious, meaningful life free of harmful automatisms.
Central themes developed in the book
1. Psychological flexibility: It is not a luxury, it is a basic need
We live in an age of constant change and high emotional demands, where well-being no longer depends so much on avoiding discomfort, but on cultivating a mind that is mindfully connected to the present and aligned with our values. A flexible mind is not a chaotic or unbounded mind. On the contrary, it is a mind capable of staying present, observing its internal contents (thoughts, emotions, memories) without judgment, reconnecting with what truly matters—our values—and and taking meaningful, value-based action, even in the face of difficulty. Far from being a gift reserved for a select few, psychological flexibility is a set of sub-skills that, when trained, becomes a vital compass for a fuller and more authentic life.
2. ACT and Enneagram: a transformative synergy
The text proposes a novel integration between the behavioral-contextual approach of ACT and the introspective wisdom of the Enneagram. While ACT provides a solid foundation in neuroscience and emotional regulation through the development of the six skills that comprise psychological flexibility—presence, defusion, acceptance, self-as-context, values, and committed action—the Enneagram offers a deep map of the personality patterns that tend to rigidify behavior. This combination allows each reader to approach their development with precise tools based on their predominant personality style.
3. From the social mask to the authentic Being
Inspired by insights from Carl Jung and other psychologists, and the spiritual tradition of the Enneagram, the book traces a journey from the social mask (personality) to the recognition of our essential Being. Personality, understood as a set of learned adaptive strategies, can become a prison when it becomes rigid. The text emphasizes the risk of becoming fused with an enneatype and losing sight of our capacity for transformation, beyond the limitations and conditioning of the ego. Personal growth culminates in a transpersonal horizon. That is, it involves disidentifying from internal stories, opening oneself to the direct experience of Being, and living from a broader and more compassionate consciousness.
4. The archetypal Hero's Journey
The transformation narrative is inspired by the archetype of the Hero's Journey (Campbell), which is intertwined with the ACT progression: answering the call, facing inner shadows (fusion, avoidance, overidentification), cultivating inner skills (presence, acceptance), rediscovering values, and committing to a meaningful life. The process is not framed as a path to perfection, but rather as a journey of authenticity and perseverance, with natural setbacks and profound breakthroughs.
Summary of the book's six chapters: Key contributions
Each chapter explains each subskill of psychological flexibility and presents specific exercises to develop and apply it in everyday life. At the end of each chapter, we show how each personality style can benefit from the proposed exercises, based on their specific needs.
Chapter I. Awareness of the present
«If peace of mind is to be found anywhere, it certainly isn’t in the past that haunts us, nor in the future that unsettles us—it’s in the ever-unfolding present. But to access that peace, we must train ourselves to inhabit the now with calm attention» (pp. 46-47).
Developing this skill involves learning to step out of "mechanical doing mode" ( autopilot ) and live in "being mode," connecting with the present through the practice of mindfulness. Three key exercises:
Dropping anchor (attention to breathing)
Naming what I perceive (internal and external, without judgment)
Body scan (connection with sensations)
For example, for the Achiever personality style (Enneatype 3), these exercises help you slow down your achievement-oriented mind and regain connection with your emotions.
Chapter II. Cognitive defusion
«As we strengthen the skill of defusion, we gradually develop the awareness that we are not our thoughts or emotions—we are the observer of them» (p. 63).
It involves observing thoughts for what they are: transient mental products, not absolute truths. This is key to deactivating the tyranny of the "ego" or "conceptualized self." Exercises to develop this sub-skill:
The bus stop (should I get on or let that thought pass?)
Leaves on the water (imagine thoughts floating)
Word repetition (seeing language as sound)
For example, for a Perfectionist personality style (Enneatype 1), defusing from the mandate “I must do it perfectly” can bring immense relief and open space for more serenity.
Chapter III. Acceptance
«Acceptance does not mean mere resignation; acceptance is a starting point for new possibilities» (p. 72).
This chapter distinguishes between clean pain (inevitable) and dirty pain (added by internal struggle). Learning to accept means letting go of resisting the emotional experience in order to act with greater freedom. Exercises:
The person in the hole (relationship between suffering and struggle)
The Unwanted Guest (Accepting the Annoying)
The garden and the weeds (coexistence with discomfort)
For example, for the Singular One personality style (Enneatype 4), these exercises will help you accept sadness without dramatizing it or clinging to it; this can be essential for breaking out of an emotional doldrums.
Chapter IV. Self-as-context
«Cultivating psychological flexibility means consciously loosening our grip on rigid self-stories and remembering that we are more than the narratives we tell ourselves—we are the conscious, transcendent self that has the power to rewrite them» (p. 86).
Here, we learn how to disidentify from the rigid narratives that sustain the ego and inhabit the "observing self." This step is essential for cultivating flexible self-esteem and more authentic relationships. Suggested exercises:
Rewrite your story (new narrative, change of perspective)
Questioning the conceptualized self (challenging limiting labels)
I am not the content of my mind (cultivating the observer self)
Bus passengers (me as a driver, empowerment and freedom)
For example, the Seductive-Giver personality style (enneatype 2) will be able to discover (or confirm) through these exercises that their value does not lie in being necessary, but in being authentic with what they truly want or desire.
Chapter V. Clarification of values
«Each person prioritizes certain values over others, creating a hierarchy that defines their orientation in life» (p. 96).
Values are not concrete goals , but rather consciously chosen directions . While goals are achieved or fulfilled, values are followed: they are paths that guide our daily decisions and behaviors. When the goals we plan are aligned with our values, we feel that our actions have a deeper and more coherent meaning. On the other hand, when our goals are oriented in a direction contrary to our values, internal dissonance often arises: a feeling that something doesn't fit with who we really are. In this chapter, we offer tools to help you reconnect with what gives meaning, direction, and fulfillment to your life. Exercises:
Notes on my values (personal list)
My Own Funeral (View from the End)
My superheroes (admiration and guidance)
VLQ: Kelly Wilson Chart (clarify priorities)
For example, for an Observer personality style (Enneatype 5), this chapter will help you move from detached observation to a life that is more heartfelt and connected to what is truly important (your values).
Chapter VI . Committed Action
«Engaging in committed action means behaving in alignment with our values—even when we face internal barriers such as procrastination, perfectionism, or fear of failure. The key is to take small steps, adapt to challenges as they arise, and persist in moving toward our chosen direction» (p. 105).
It's time to translate values into action . Here, we address common obstacles such as procrastination and perfectionism , and offer three concrete strategies for designing actions more realistically and efficiently. These strategies are explained in the following exercises:
The decision point (key moment in decision-making)
The ACT Matrix (values-oriented behavioral map)
SMART planning (planning an actionable action)
For example, for a Mediator personality style (Enneatype 9), this chapter can be a key push to break out of inertia and make decisions that have been put off.
What if the journey was the true destination?
At the end of the book, I propose a reflection inspired by the archetype of the Hero's Journey: the path we all must take when we feel our lives need more truth, presence, or meaning. ACT offers us the tools; the Enneagram offers us the map. But the journey—as always—is deeply yours .
Personal growth isn't a linear or immediate path, but rather a process that requires patience, commitment, and compassion . In the book's epilogue, the story of the spider who rebuilds its web again and again despite its setbacks symbolizes the resilient attitude we can all cultivate . Just as the spider doesn't give up in the face of frustration but instead resumes its task with quiet determination, we too can try again whenever we lose presence, stray from our values, or stumble into old patterns.
Practicing a flexible mind does not require perfection, but rather perseverance and a willingness to return again and again to the chosen path .
Finally, what you need to know about this text:
Who is this book for?
If you're a therapist, coach, teacher, or counselor, you'll find resources to enrich your work with others.
If you are in your own transformation process, this book can be a clear, insightful, and practical guide to advancing along the path of personal development.
If you're curious about your inner world, want to know yourself better, and even move toward a better version of yourself, this book will offer valuable distinctions, powerful questions, and concrete exercises.
What do you take away from reading it?
A clear and in-depth understanding of the nine Enneagram personality styles, a guide you can use to identify your own.
Practical tools to make your rigid patterns more flexible.
Exercises to reconnect with your values.
Resources to help you make decisions more aligned with who you want to be.
An integrative and accessible framework to support you and others.
Above and below, you can find links to purchase your digital copy. Thank you.
May it be useful!
Until next time,
Marcelo Aguirre
References
Aguirre, E.M. (2015). A Flexible Mind: Tools for Integrating Psychological Flexibility and the Enneagram into Your Personal Development . Dunken.
Hayes, S. C. (2019). A Liberated Mind. How to Pivot Toward What Matters. Penguin Random House LLC.
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